“He did not enjoy parents’ love. And, he didn’t get to fully enjoy his parenthood either. Pain, pain, pain from everywhere… Where and how, which one should you place? A devalued, worthless life…” — Nubar Avetisyan often talks to himself recently. This habit arose after losing her husband.

She lived in Stepanakert. She was not living, but walking through hell. Especially in the last three years. she lost her two brothers in the 44-Day War.

The mother visited the grave of the boys three times a day. And, she died there, on the grave of her two sons, from a stroke.

Before being displaced, during the last attack in September, her father fell from a walnut tree and was hospitalized with 8 broken vertebrae.

Her husband, Zori Danielyan, born in Stepanakert, position guard, contract soldier, who was in the military for 17 years, died on September 19 in the nearby positions of Chartar.

“He was only 37 years old. He grew up almost without parents; his parents died early. His life were his children. He said, I must be a good father. Whatever the children wanted, he said that he would buy it. He bought…” ,  sobbing, tells the woman.

She has three children, with whom she somehow moved to Yerevan.

The most difficult thing was to remove the father, Grisha Avetisyan, from the intensive care unit and transfer him to Yerevan, in order to organize medical assistance.

“He occupied one seat in the Ford. We moved daddy wiyh all equipments attached to him for removing water and blood from the lungs. We brought him with the car’s door open. “He has lost two sons, lost a son-in-law, he doesn’t know that the husband has died yet,” Nubar recalls.

The brother and his wife buried Zoro. At that time, they kept him in Machkalashen, in one of the villages of Martunu region, where Nubar’s father’s house was.

“There was no way to get my husband’s body to Stepanakert because the road to Stepanakert was closed. My husband was in positions near Machkalashen and Chartar. It became unreachable from the 19th of the month. On the third day, we found out that he was no more. My brother learned that the bodies of thedead were in the basement of the school. The Russians took them out of their positions and put them in the basement of the school. They remained there three days, without refrigeration… On the 21st of the month, my brother went, recognized him, broke the door and window of the club, made a coffin, and took him to Chartar, because we didn’t have our village to bury him, and we couldn’t bring him to Stepanakert, because the road from Martuni to Stepanakert was closed. In Chartar, at night, my sister-in-law held a lantern, my brother buried Zoro,” says Nubar.

Swallows her tears. She has three children; the youngest is 6 years old. The eldest is 16. The middle child is 13. They are all in Jrvezh, at a relative’s house. She does not know what will happen next. She hasn’t taken the children to school yet. “I am waiting to settle mentally in this new reality, I will take them [to school] later. We are not able now,” Nubar Avetisyan explains.

She has her husband’s death certificate. She found it with difficulty, hoping that as a soldier’s wife, some help will reach her. “I took this document somehow, there was no documents in any hospital. The archive has burned. They had set it all on fire and left,” says Nubar. She did not receive anything from the state. The death certificate of her husband was taken to the Ministry of Defense, where they said to wait,  because they cannot help at this moment.

Well, that man served for 17 years, gave his life, and that’s it? Aimlessly? For the sake of nothing, as the Prime Minister’s wife Anna Hakobya said? Should it be like this? Nubar does not have answers to these questions. She told the children that their father is in position and will return.


Syuzan Simonyan

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